In a world where little eyes are always watching, how we walk and talk matters more than we realize. Our children, and even those who aren’t our biological children, observe our every move, learning how to respond to life’s challenges by watching us.

How Do Children Learn to Follow God’s Path?

One of the most common questions parents ask is, “How do we make our kids follow the Lord and do what is right?” The simple truth is that we can’t make them. Children are individuals with their own free will and desires. We cannot force them to follow any path, but we can guide them through our own example.

Throughout the Bible, we see this pattern repeated: “He walked in all the ways of his father had walked.” Whether serving idols or following God’s commands, children often follow the path their parents model.

Four Ways to Guide Children Toward Faith

1. Let Them Witness Your Struggle

One of the best ways to lead wisely is to let children see your struggles. Jesus himself told us, “In this world, you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” Struggles are inevitable, so allowing children to witness how we handle difficulties teaches them valuable lessons.

However, this doesn’t mean burdening children with adult problems. As Corrie ten Boom’s father wisely demonstrated to her, parents carry weights so their children don’t have to. Some knowledge is too heavy for children, but they should understand that burdens exist and see how we handle them.

Jesus modeled this perfectly in the Garden of Gethsemane. He brought his disciples with him to witness his anguish, letting them hear his prayers: “My Father, if it is possible, let this cup pass from me. Yet not as I will, but as you will.” He showed them how to struggle well while maintaining faith.

When we allow our children to see our struggles in age-appropriate ways, we empower them to handle their own difficulties later in life. Our job isn’t to shield them from struggles but to prepare them to bear them.

2. Don’t Give Influence to Those Who Don’t Deserve It

As parents, we have the primary responsibility for raising and training our children. When we give that influence to others who don’t deserve it, we sacrifice our role in shaping their character.

During childhood development, kids go through stages of identity formation. From ages 6-12, they’re asking, “Am I capable and competent?” In their teen years, they’re figuring out who they are in different contexts. Throughout these stages, they look to parents and peers for answers.

Deuteronomy 6 reminds us of our responsibility: “These words that I’m giving you today are to be in your heart. Repeat them to your children. Talk about them when you sit in your house, and when you walk along the road, and when you lie down, and when you get up.”

We must teach our children how to allow the right influences into their lives so that when they face difficulties, they can discern what guidance to accept and what to reject.

3. Fathers Play a Vital Role in Children’s Faith

Contrary to what many believe, fathers have the most significant impact on whether children will attend church regularly and embrace faith. The statistics are striking:

• If only the mother attends church regularly, there’s just a 1.5% chance the child will attend church.
• If the father attends regularly (even if the mother doesn’t), there’s a 44% chance the child will go to church regularly.

This doesn’t mean God can’t work in other situations—He certainly can and does. But when fathers demonstrate that faith matters by showing up at church, serving in ministries, and participating in small groups, children notice and follow their example.

The good news is that it’s never too late to start. If you’re just beginning your faith journey, your children will notice the change, and it can make all the difference in their lives.

4. Pray Constantly

Prayer should be our first and most frequent response to parenting challenges. We need to pray for:

• Ourselves to be the parents
• God has called us to be
• Our children’s protection and growth
• Their friends and influences
• Their future spouses
• Their schools and environments

Jesus prayed for his disciples, saying, “I am not praying that you take them out of the world, but that you protect them from the evil one.” Our children are in a spiritual battle, just as we are. Ephesians 6:12 reminds us that “our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers of this darkness, against evil spiritual forces in the heavens.”

Let your children see you pray. Let them know you pray for them. This models the importance of spiritual disciplines and shows them how to seek God in all circumstances.

Life Application

Our children and those around us are watching how we live. They notice our responses to stress, our priorities, and our faith practices. The question is: What are we modeling for them?

This week, consider these questions:

1. What struggles am I facing that I could share (appropriately) with my children to help them learn how to handle difficulties with faith?
2. What influences am I allowing into my children’s lives? Are these influences worthy of shaping their character?
3. As a father, how am I demonstrating the importance of faith to my children? If I’m not a father, how am I supporting the fathers around me?
4. What am I consistently praying for regarding my children or the children in my life?

Remember, it’s never too late to start modeling faith. Even if you feel you’ve made mistakes in the past, you can begin today to demonstrate what it means to follow Jesus. Whether you have children of your own or not, someone is watching your example. Make it one worth following.