Kenneth Ray Reid 7/1961.  That is almost everything I know about my biological father.  That and he served in the Army and has a twin sister named Debbie.  We now all know the same thing.  According to one census there are about 24 million children in the US right now living in a home without a biological father.  Some families may be divorced or have other similar circumstances so lets go ahead and drop that number in half to 12 million children…. Does that make it easier to bear?  Lets go ahead and add in the last two generations but only half from each and say 12 million adults who do not know or have any relationship with their fathers.  I am one of those 12 million.

Don’t get me wrong I am not whining.  I have done that and I have moved on (as much as one can) but I still think about it from time to time.  I think what did I do wrong, what was wrong with me, and so on.  Truth is there was nothing I could do on my part I was not even born yet.  No, it was just him deciding for whatever reason he did not want to be a father.  So I do the only thing I can, I forgive and I move on.  I take all of those feelings and fears and put them to good use.  I strive to be a great father to my children.  My wife and I have a daughter and she has two boys from her first marriage.  The only thing that is different between the three of them to me is that one is a girl.  I love those boys with all of my heart, I would and have done anything for them.

Why do I tell you this?  Why like any other time do I ask for a minute of your time?  Because sometimes life sucks, sometimes we are given a raw deal.  I want to you to know that I feel you I really do but at some point you have to make a choice.  You have to ask yourself “Will I let my past and my circumstances direct me, or will I take control?”  

I want to see fathers lead their families, I want to see young men who are like me (fatherless) come to the Father and see the life He has for them.  I want them to take what the world handed them and use it to reach others with the hope of Christ.  I want to see boys become men of God.  I know how hard it is and the pain from some things never actually go away.  Sometimes it hits me from nowhere (like now) but when it does I am reminded that I am not that man, no I am not him.  I am ME a new man in God and I will lead my family.  I will be there to take my kids out when I do not want to.  I will watch Disney when I want to watch UFC, and I will not let others decide who they become I will be a man.

Women, you are not unwanted, and you are not disposable.  You have a Father that loves you, and cares for you.  You do not have to seek attention or “love” from men who only care about themselves.  You were created for a purpose and have a mission for your life.  I know the love of a woman who knows who she is in Christ and I am so very blessed by it.  When you give yourself to God He will make you whole and new.  I cannot speak much as to what it means to be a woman who has no father but I can say you are worth more than you know, and any man who does not value you is not a man at all.


Just a thought,


For as for me and my house we will serve the LORD. – Joshua 24:15